Sacral | Elk | Water Violet
I Learn From Others.
A visit from elk is a reminder to let yourself be seen! Are you most comfortable being alone and used to keeping a distance from others? Do you find it hard to connect with people because you usually don’t find it that interesting or you feel too vulnerable after opening up? When elk appears, you are being invited to look at your barriers within connection with others that keep you from establishing fulfilling, meaningful or sustainable relationships.
Have you decided that if you don’t NEED anyone you will never get hurt again? Or maybe you fear someone losing interest or replacing you. Jealousy comes from a lack of self-worth from a younger age. Keeping a wall up or acting aloof to avoid bonding with others can leave you feeling alone and unseen. To balance this pattern, Elk reminds you that in order to be seen, you must first see others. Making an effort to find interest in others allows a mutual sharing of soul gifts. As we learn from one another, we soften our inner barriers and can enjoy one of the most rewarding feelings as a human being….true heart connection.
Elk also brings the message to make time to gather within healing circles. Sharing your feelings with others will remind you that we all go through similar life challenges and relationship dynamics. A sense of community helps you remember that it takes a village to raise a child, and that we all have gifts to offer the tribe.
Bach Flower Essence: Water Violet
Key Words: Connection, healthy individuation, jealousy, aloof, father bond, betrayal trauma, cheating, seeing gifts in others, trust, community, being seen, spleen, kidneys, urinary system.
Action Steps:
Do you lose attraction and interest in your partner? Are you truly seeing them or letting yourself be seen? Have you lost your individual identity? Contemplate your barriers to intimacy and relationship codependency.
Do you often feel jealous? Journal around memories of rejection and jealousy at age 14.
Look to your formative relationship with your father/masculine for clues to healing this pattern. This is a response to rejection or betrayal trauma, or if you felt your father acted disinterested in you at some point.
Be willing to talk openly and honestly with your partner about what is causing intimacy issues in your relationship. Communication is key, as well as planning time together such as walks, or playful adventures. Practice seeing each other!
Do you avoid people seeing you? Notice if you shy away from too much eye contact or get uncomfortable after deep conversations. Practice letting people see the real, vulnerable you.
Practice looking into peoples eyes and listening with your heart. Notice if and when you let people “in.”
Practice telling people in your life the unique things you notice and appreciate in them. Truly seeing someone means noticing meaningful, subtle details.
Were you aware of or affected by inappropriate sexual energy being directed at you at a young age? Reflect on any sexual objectification that happened to you. This can contribute to a hesitance to connect.
Make a conscious effort to notice gifts, talents and strengths in others so that you find interest in everyone that crosses your path.
Did you experience one of your parents being unfaithful to the other? How did this affect your sense of relationship security?
See yourself! Take time each day to notice and appreciate yourself.
Do new things with your partner to release the bonding hormone oxytocin such as mini adventures or vacations. Step out of the routine.
Do you have a pattern of eventually wanting to attract others outside of your relationship, and not wanting your partner to be attracted to you? Journal around when this started in your life.
Find healings circles, workshops or holistic gatherings that resonate with you. Connect with others in groups and practice sharing your feelings.
Being cheated on can have the same vibrational impact as being raped. Both lead to an avoidance of connection because opening up feels too close to the original trauma. Find a holistic technique that helps you integrate the original trauma.
Sit in meditation with your 14-year-old self. Let memories and feelings surface around someone pulling away from you or disconnecting.
Remember to get into the heart. When we fear betrayal we often leave our heart-center and play stories of the mind. Get back into the heart to remember you are safe.
